Crumbling wall
by Khalko
Summary: Despite being the most competent soldier against the titans, even corporal Levi is proven to be just a human when he gets nearly killed in a titan attack. Slight LevixEren.


/This is set in time somewhat after Eren got in control of his titan powers, the shifters have not been revealed, and the SOS members are still alive. This is my first fic, so be prepared; it's not perfect but I tried to make it good./

"Early, aren't you, Corporal?" the bakery man nodded, half-asleep, and greeted Levi as he saw him stepping into the store. "I noticed I didn't have any breakfast in my pantry," The scout explained. "Ah, I guess you came for the flatbread. Barley, was it?" The corporal agreed with a nod to the man and waited patiently as the baker politely picked the fresh ones for him and wrapped them up. Actually Levi wasn't even that early on the move. Half the city had already left their beds and were enjoying their free day each in their own way. Levi himself was planning to spend it by ridding his house of the dust that had gathered to an amount that had made him cringe when he had gotten back to town yesterday late at night. While walking in front of the newly set up flower shop, Levi's eyes rested lazily on Eren walking across the street and chatting with Mikasa and Armin. It was rare for the corporal to see the titan boy without his focused, determined gaze that had now made way to a much more relaxed, smiling expression. For the first time, the corporal caught himself pondering how old the boy was_._

He was sure that Hanji had mentioned the kid's age, but he had completely forgotten some parts of the discussion they had had after Eren had been taken to custody. Or more like **Hanji's **discussion: she had barely remembered her tea, being too excited about this new turn concerning titans and humans and keeping on talking and talking, leaving no wide gap for the corporal to express his thoughts and instead leaving him to content himself with at least not letting his tea get cold. _Wait... wasn't that the boy I saved along with his friends that day the colossal titan appeared the second time? _The man had suddenly connected the two pieces during that conversation.

_I'd be devastated if I found out he's twenty. No, it must have been something below that. But he can't be much older than fourteen. He seems to have had his growth spurt already. _The corporal, who represented pretty accurately an average woman's height, regarded the inches that made Eren slightly taller than his friends, making him almost the same height as a typical male adult.

Levi's vision was interrupted by dust and the clattering of bricks a few blocks away. The sound from the colossal titan's kick to the wall alone would have gotten his attention. Good thing he was practically at his doorstep. A moment later he had already tossed his groceries onto the writing table, put on his 3DMG, armed himself and gone back out onto the street. As he had guessed, it seemed that the colossal titan had vanished as in the two former times. But not without leaving behind a titan mess to take care of. Levi took a quick, vague glance from the rooftop he had jumped to with the help of his 3DMG. _Nothing too bad for us to handle, this won't take long. Ten to twenty men is enough, there is already a good number of our scouts here. As expected. We might survive with just a casualty of five civilians or less if we are quick. Have to hope that those Garrison men don't panic and leave the hole unguarded. _He couldn't help but sneer as the titan that had almost walked past him stopped. There was a woman civilian on the ground, judging by the screaming that had drawn the titan's attention to the woman - and at same time exposed its neck to Levi. "I must say, you are far from a deviant." With ease, the corporal had but to move a smooth, slow step forward and swing his right hand to draw a red line of the titan's blood in the air starting from its neck. The pavement let out a lamenting voice as a weight equivalent to three horses dropped to the ground. A surprised scream down below transformed into retreating footsteps. Hopefully the woman wouldn't come across another titan and would take shelter inside. But you never know, humans don't act in the most logical way when panic takes control of them.

_Leberl and Seifart appear to be taking care of the one near the bakery. Hmm, there are a couple of deviants after all, but they seem to have them under control in no time. The one near the gate, on the other hand, seems to be reserved for me unless Landau gets his taken care of before I get there.. _The corporal was getting ready to get to his new target when he heard an ominous sound and tried to locate it. _Behind..!_

He was turning around to face the source of the voice, gripping his right sword and already positioning his left sword hand slightly behind him. Too late. The corporal attempted to make a swift dodge when he detected the titan that had finished off the unfortunate civilian on the pavement, raising its head now above the roof to the corporal's level. The corporal barely had the time to budge before hands the size of him moved somewhere behind his back and got a grip on him. Levi still had his swords, but both his arms were under the tight grip of the titan, making it hard to move around. Perplexed by this sudden change in the situation, Levi made a couple of struggling movements, hoping to free himself or to at least make a tiny cut to the titan's arm. Only exhaustion resulted from this. The titan's hands were pressing nastily against his lungs, making it hard to breathe. Levi heard the clank of his swords hitting the pavement below. The grimy teeth of the titan were revealed, lined up to form a smile as if it was mocking his futile actions.

The man distinguished the smell of vomit and blood, the latter oddly always reminiscent of metal in the corporal's mind. The titan's two lines of teeth moved further away from each other, displaying to the man the huge palate previously hidden by them. The smell itself was nothing new to the corporal, who had seen corpse after corpse, but now it was more fierce than ever before. He knew that he had to call out for help. _Hanji, Petra, Seifart, Leberl, I have to call out to anyone or no one will come. On the other hand, who'd get here on time at this point? _He recalled some of the moments from the battlefield where he had turned to the direction of his comrades begging him loudly to come to their rescue, only to rush there too late, to witness before him how a person turned into a sack of meat and blood as the skin and the clothes covering them were ripped open by the titans' cruel jaws. And now, it would be his organs on street. He couldn't think of what to do; there appeared to be no thoughts that could lend him an escape from this feeling.

The titan's eyes gave a surprised blink as blood surged upwards as if trying to reach Hanji, who had made a nice clean slice to the titan's neck. It fell on its side, dead. Levi started gasping for all the air he had been denied and freed himself clumsily from the titan's sluggish hands, his heart still beating rapidly. His eyes decreased back to their normal size and his expression calmed to its usual state. "You okay, Levi?" Levi raised his gaze from the titan's hands - which had started decaying in the flame - to Hanji hanging from the tower, looking worriedly at her corporal. "Mmm, sorry about that. I was too careless." Hanji opened her mouth but then closed it again and settled for that, seeing that the corporal had no visible injuries, not even a broken rib bone. "How is our situation?" Levi's breathing had steadied by now. Hanji transferred her view from the corporal to the city. "Seems like that was the last one. Oh! Beate is taking on two at once!" _Ah, so we did have a soldier casualty.._The corporal's brows furrowed closer to each other as he ordered, "Go help him. I'll report the situation if no one hasn't already. I'll make sure they're getting that hole jammed shut." Hanji nodded and left without a question. She didn't need to hear the words to know that Levi much appreciated not having to kick the bucket just yet, thanks to her. Also..there were those times **he **had been there to keep her from turning into a corpse. She was just happy to be finally returning the favor. As Levi headed to the gate, the face of a newly recruited scout flashed through his vision. _It was propably Mauthner.. _A red-haired, black-eyed girl whose voice Levi had been irritated by and whom he had even asked once to keep her mouth shut. Now that voice had been erased from this world and couldn't ever be returned.

. . .

"How about Nika?" People around the long table didn't have to answer the question Hanji had been leaving unsaid, waiting until they had gone through the most important parts of the meeting. Their silent pause told Zoe everything. "Oh.." Hanji let her gaze drop to the table's surface. Levi sat impatiently on the other side of the table. It was not the meeting that was making him restless, but how it delayed the moment he'd get rid of the clothes that had an unpleasant stench of sweat, blood and titan to them. "The relatives will be informed soon this day. It is unfortunate but on the whole, we can count ourselves lucky: both civilian and military loss was surprisingly minor. A great part of that is thanks to the military police" – Levi let out a snort - "whose speedy action prevented this town from being filled with a greater number of titans," Commander Erwin complimented, turning his words to Dawk who nodded respectfully. "How long will the repairments take?" Levi asked Commander Pixis, who seemed relaxed. "The temporary solution will hold until we get the wall's hole in shape no less than stronger before the attack. Propably we'll be done before tomorrow's sunset-" "Wait, you're not using Eren?" Hanji rose, pushing her chair back, and faced Erwin. "I know last time it didn't go as planned, but he's in control of his titan form so there's nothing to-" Levi interrupted Hanji: "It's not a matter of him being able to control it or not being able to control it. It's a matter of public opinion. The situation does not require us to take such drastic actions. We can't trust on Jaeger's titan shifting with every single thing that comes across. " Levi explained this calmly to Hanji, who sat back down.

. . .

Levi sat down to his bed, tired. The work caused by the attacks weren't limited to just the obvious fighting but also increased the amount of paperwork from guard duty, weapon condition checks and the situation on ammunition. The wrapped breads Levi had hurriedly placed on his table had fallen out onto the floor. A shadow appeared on the corporal's face as he now remembered not still having cleaned the floors. He sat for a while staring at the opposite wall, rose up and went to his broom cupboard.

. . .

His title was mentioned. Levi tried to answer in vain, intuitively knowing that it was him that had been referred to. Besides the scarce exchange of words, he could hear hooves and a wagon's wheels rolling against the ground. This reminded him of something familiar..were they going to or returning from the expedition? _Why are they not answering me? _The corporal thought in frustration_. _

"Yes?" He repeated himself, louder, gaining no answer. His eyes did not open despite his efforts. Levi tried to remember if he had gotten his eyes damaged in a fight. They were still talking. Those around him..new recruits? Resiliently, he tried to open his eyes to see who they were but something was blocking his vision, forcing him to rely on his hearing.

"Shit, that was a load of them," a high-pitched male voice commented nervously.

_Hey, answer me, you.. Am I wounded? _Levi felt a strange heaviness on top of him, like a boulder. He couldn't move even a finger.

"Who would have expected? Such a number, it really took us by surprise." the whining voice another man agreed.

There was a pause as neither of them said anything. Levi's focus was at its fullest as he tried to find out what had happened.

Finally the one who had last spoken uttered more of what was on his mind, his voice crumbling: "The first one was the worst. If it weren't for it, I think he.."

Levi's stomach clenched.

"I think corporal Levi would have survived."

The first thing Levi noticed as his eyes snapped open was his dark room. But his own tongue, aching from being bitten, came a close second.

. . .

Two days later the whole scouting legion was admitted a free day, as a thanks to their successful co-operation in getting the hole repaired and avoiding the evacuation of the town. They celebrated by going to Candle-snuff, one of the local taverns. Everyone was in the mood for celebration.

"I'm glad I got there on time to save you, you know." Hanji smiled gently at Levi - who was sitting at the table - a few hours after they had been there, patted his shoulder a bit too roughly and with sweeping, light steps made her way to the ordering desk. "Ah, no way I'm going to get going before I've had my secound round~~!" Levi, who watched Hanji's ever cheerful figure disappear into the crowd, rose from his chair and left the warmth of the bar. This time of the night on a usual day, he'd start to organize his papers on the shelf and allow his eyes to close and get some rest. But he was now feeling again that restlessness that was keeping him wide awake.

This was a spot that Levi had managed to hide from himself by ignoring its presence for the past few days, but it hadn't subsided one bit. Suppression no longer worked. The barkings of soldiers saying he had no human feelings, that he was empty inside, was something he regarded with pride: it helped him not to waver, was there to keep him from falling and to help him move forward, towards the scouting legion's goal. No, **the entire humanity's **mutual goal. He instantly regretted leaving the noise and the chatter of the tavern where this new taint had only acted like background music coming and going. _This is unnecessary. _The corporal tried to calm himself and escape the memory that was growing steadily and taking hold of him.

He may have dealt several years with a job that couldn't exactly be called one of the safest - having quite the high mortality rate - and there were times when the corporal had been within an inch or a half from becoming titan food. The difference was that those had been over in the blink of an eye and he hadn't necessarily taken note of them, whereas in the latest he had been given all too much time to taste death close up, with him being only able to submit. The corporal took a look at his hand. He could see the veins that slowly increased in size to pump blood to his lowered hand. He thought about Hanji, Erwin and the other people celebrating in the tavern.

Thoughts he had not allowed himself were now rushing like a thunderstorm. _What if it truly is not possible..We have been losing some of our best men who could have made a huge difference had they been alive. Maybe we have already reached a point where our numbers are too few, with not enough skilled soldiers to hold against the titans.. __One day, the attack will be too much for us, and we'll have no more walls to barricade ourselves behind. One by one, the towns will be eaten up. Every civilian, every soldier, every single human. Maybe I'd be the one last man on the battlefield, cornered, having no reason to fight back any longer. _Levi could all too well imagine this scenario to be possible in the near future. Five years ago they had lost Wall Maria that everyone, himself included, had thought to be impregnable. Even Wall Rose had now suffered two attacks in a short space of time. It was just a matter of time when it would be his skull between a titan's sinking teeth.

It felt as if Levi was held by those titan hands again, having to fight for air. He placed his left hand's fingers on his forehead, covering his closed eyes with his palm, and lowered his head till his jaw was pressed towards his chest.

. . .

"Ah, Eren, you wouldn't mind, would you? Taking these and getting them to Corporal Levi, please?" Hanji smiled and handed over a pair of gloves that Eren took and stuck in his jacket's pocket. "The nights are quite cold already, he really should start taking more care of himself, that man! It would be a shame to lose our scouting legion's best man to the flu, right?" Hanji laughed, leaning backwards on the bench with a wide smile, but brought herself back towards the table and seemed to look vaguely somewhere behind Eren. As Eren took a quick glance to check if there was somebody behind him, Hanji spoke in a way that reminded him oddly of a sigh: "He never does.." Eren shrugged his shoulders: "Mmm, of course. See you." "Bye, Eren!" Hanji yelled at the boy's back.

Hanji was right about the change in temperature. It really was starting to get chillier the time of the day when the sun had settled completely behind the walls, letting Eren see the light of countless stars throbbing like a fire in the lantern against the ink-coloured sky. The titan blood in Jaeger kept him more warm than other people, but still his breath was steaming in the cold. _He's not here. _Eren switched his gaze back from up to see if the corporal was in the yard, leaning against some wall looking bored, as he could well imagine the stiff man doing. _Oh right, umm, his house is that way..I think? _Eren started jogging, not sure if he'd catch up to the upper soldier. _I guess if he's already home I could just drop these by. Autumns's not going away after all._

. . .

Levi cast his hand away from his face, senses heightened by the sudden rustle the leaves made when the black-haired boy's feet drifted through them. The corporal froze.

_Not the kid._

"Corporal-" Eren immediately knew he had made a horrible mistake the moment Levi turned his gaze towards him. Jaeger managed to stammer at least some words despite his tongue feeling like it had gotten stuck somewhere between his mouth and throat when he remembered the reason he was here: "Hanji wanted me to give you these." The leather gloves Eren had retrieved clumsily from his pocket lay now on his right hand, extended towards the corporal. Levi closed in on him a couple steps, noticing clearly how their vanishing distance made Eren stiffen.

Levi took the gloves awkwardly and declared: "Good, you may go." He cursed mentally at how drained his voice had sounded coming out and spoke each following word with more emphasis: "Just to make sure; you are not to tell anyone what you saw."

"What I saw.." The vision Eren had just come across to was still playing in his head. Did he just catch **the corporal** crying!?

"**Jaeger." **The corporal's tone was hard and cold like steel and snapped Eren from his confusion, reminding him that he'd have to focus unless he wanted a knee in his stomach. "Of course not," Jaeger lowered his face obediently but kept going awkwardly, looking hesitantly back to the corporal's face.

"Coporal..As someone who has seen horrible things-" _Well, who hasn't, **stupid**. _Eren regretted his words and tried to think quickly of something better to say. Eren was having second thoughts about trying to have this conversation. He'd really rather wanted to get out of this conversation of theirs without any punishments if possible.

"I guess I'm trying to say-" Levi made a sudden move closer, surprising Eren and leaving his sentence unfinished. Something scary was starting to flame in the corporal's tired eyes. Eren looked, bewildered, into Levi's face, which was slightly tilted upwards so the scout could make proper eye contact with the boy: "Listen, kid..This whatever you are trying to do right now. Just stop it. You're not doing yourself any good with it." The stern look the corporal kept giving Eren without a hint of wavering was more than enough to make Jaeger decide not to delve deeper into the corporal's private matters. But Levi wasn't done. Not just yet: "And I **will **know if you spread this" - the stern look dimmed for a second - "and if that happens, I will make sure Hanji experiments on the time period your limbs take to grow back when they've been all ripped." There was no question. He really meant it.

Eren nodded shortly and Levi gave a nod as he gave Eren back the personal space he had shortly invaded from him. He waited for the boy to start moving, tightening his grip on the gloves still in his hands. Instead, Jaeger kept still and stared intensely into the corporal's eyes, as if there would be something written there if he just looked hard enough. _I don't get it..I don't get it at all..! _The corporal's gaze strayed away from Eren's face, giving Eren only those few seconds to start moving, and instead he turned his back to the boy and walked calmly away as if nothing had happened.

_How could I have let a brat see me like that?_

But something **had **happened.

_. . ._

Armin fell backwards with a yelp, raising some dust from the dry ground he had landed on. He and Eren both knew that physical combat was...not really his area of expertise.

"Sorry, my stamina is getting low," the blond-haired boy explained to the tall boy who had kicked him to the ground.

As Armin rose to his feet to continue their training, Eren pointed out: "It's alright, we have been at this since lunch time." Some of the scouts had already called it a day and the two boys had been about to do the same until Hanji showed up. She waved to the boys as she paced towards them.

"Judging by your clothing, you've done exactly what I was thinking of doing today," she commented, noting their clothes that had been coated with a layer of light dirt.

"Yeah, I asked Eren to practise a dodge with me. But I think I'll need to pick it up again tomorrow.."Armin'd bangs hid more of his face as he lowered it, disappointed with himself.

"It's okay, it's okay! You'll get there eventually. What move were you two practising?" Hanji encouraged the blond boy. The boys demonstrated it to her, with Armin being the attacker and Eren being the defender.

"Ah, I remember that one. You know what, I'll help you. I'd actually be more than happy to do some exercising since I've done nothing more than sit on my chair for all too long." Hanji sighed happily as she started flexing her legs and continued: "I think I've made a new record with the paper piles taking over my room, you should have seen Levi's face when he handed me those- Oh right, you handed him those gloves, right, Eren?"

Eren forced himself not to avoid eye contact with Hanji as he replied: "Yeah, I caught up with him."

"Good, let's hope our clean freak takes the hint and starts to dress according to the season," Hanji laughed and streched her neck to the left.

"Uh..has something happened to him?" The words just escaped from Eren's lips before he thought them through.

"Why you ask?" Hanji blinked and returned her head to its normal position, now only focusing on their conversation, as did Armin. Eren had not said anything about that night to his friends.

"Uhh, well.." Eren was beginning to break into a nervous sweat as he recalled Levi's menacing promise to him.

"Actually," Hanji's tone changed completely to a serious one. "The last time we had that titan attack on our town, Levi got in a bad pinch."

"The corporal, in a pinch, what do you mean?" Armin insisted skeptically. He and Eren had some difficulty imagining the corporal having a hard time with the titans.

"One of them got him." Eren's legs had trouble supporting him.

"But not for too long, as you obviously know!" Hanji hastened to say as she saw the boys' looks becoming horrified and continued calming them: "He didn't get any injuries..But it was scary for both me and him," she finished, remembering how she had hurried to the scene, ignoring her exhaustion, knowing that if she slowed her pace she wouldn't make it in time.

"That.." Eren burst out, but he didn't even know what he was going to say. He rushed away from the yard, leaving a very confused Armin and Hanji behind him.

_. . ._

Eren swung the door open violently. Levi was sitting in his chair, facing the work on his desk, but his head had been turned towards the door as soon as he had heard Eren's steps. The moment he recognized those steps, he got irritated. "You better have a good reason for opening that door without knocking, brat-" "You almost got eaten!?" Levi's eyes widened a bit, confused._ "_Yes, it was partly because I was too ignorant of my surroundings, not realizing to keep myself covered. I was overconfident," Levi explained calmly as if Eren had asked him about his visit to relatives. But this did not calm Jaeger down: _Why..why are you looking me like that, like it's nothing..! _Levi raised his brow, looking at the boy: "You shouldn't get so worked up, these things happen. You have been on the scouting trips, so you know that people die. Are you going to react like this every time someone dies or almost does? Don't forget that in that case, you may not be able to save the ones still alive." Levi waited for Eren to nod or just leave as abruptly as he had entered the room, but when there was no sign of either, he simply turned himself back to his work with a sigh. _Where was I- _Hands - not titan hands but rough human boy hands – gripped his shoulders and forced him along with his chair to turn to the furious boy: "This is not about you giving me a fucking lecture!" Eren snapped at the scout whose eyes had widened with surprise. "I admit, I may be younger so you adults act all mighty but there is something fucking wrong with you! Aren't you afraid of dying, afraid of pain?" After all that yelling that had filled the room, the silence that fell after those words seemed intimidating. "Have I ever said I don't?" Levi had to actually think for a second if it was okay for him to say that. The tone in Eren's voice changed drastically, as if he had something in his throat: "Then say it! I want you to admit that even you can get scared!"

To Levi, it felt like he was being pulled in two different directions. One was his role in society, the importance of keeping society alive by moulding himself to its needs, the responsibility for the future of the entire human race. Fear was like the rust that would just hurt that mechanism. But he also recognized somewhere deep within himself a little boy in the corner hiding under the blanket.

Levi finally spoke quietly to the floor with a deep frown on his face: "Yes," and raised his gaze to the boy. Eren felt his eyes tearing up, swiped his eyes hastily and mumbled to the corporal now gone speechless: "Thank you." This conversation did not make any sense or have any purpose. But Levi felt a bit lighter in his chest.

/Thank you for reading, I'm planning on continuing this story with more chapters/


End file.
